Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Bells Ringing, Cop Lights Flashing, Marriages Brewing, and A Lot of Really Cool Socks

We've all been through college and seen some pretty wicked theme parties with the most popular theme around the Holidays being Ugly Christmas Sweater parties. I can guarantee there has NEVER been an Ugly Sweater party quite like this one. Ignoring the fact that we invited 400 more people than our little apartment would hold, I would like to enlighten you all with the success that was the 2nd Annual Ugly Christmas Sweater Party, Dec. 11, 2009.

I'll start off with a look into what the night before the party brought. Brian and Stacy came over to help move furniture which helped in two ways, it protected the furniture and gave us "so much more room for activities!" The dining room table was moved to Tim's room and after making a long mark alllll the way down the hallway wall, the loveseat ended up at the foot of Nathan's bed. Nathan and Tim, in a strikingly similar to grinch-like manner, went to Brian's to get an extra futon for seating and steal Christmas decorations. Because Liz is one of those REALLY over-festive people she has an over-abundance of decorations. I received a voicemail from Liz that went something like this, "Tim and Nathan just came to our apartment and took all of my Christmas decorations including the Christmas candles. I feel like I've been robbed."

Moving on to the start of the party:

When you bring together three different groups of friends, classmates, and mere acquaintances it's bound to get wild as Tim does when he does the Stanky Leg dance. You would think that pregaming wouldn't be necessary for a party that started at 7 and offered plenty of "Peppermint Patties" and "Apple Pie" but Neal and Mike found it COMPLETELY necessary. Not only did they hold a mid-afternoon pregame but they also borrowed sweaters from Trueblood's dad's closet.

If you would like to know how the pre-game + party turned out for these two you should ask them personally, on your own time. Just for a head's up, they probably don't remember.

Mike and Neal may have had on ugly sweaters, but Tim and Nathan won the best costume contest. Titled "Midget Santa and His Reindeer"

Evidently Goodwill carries a lot more ugly Christmas sweaters for women than for men because a majority of the males that showed up on Friday were decked out in womens' clothing. Nathan's outfit above was no exception. He came back to my room before the party to have me help him pull on his sweater over the turtleneck. I asked him what in the WORLD was wrong with his turtleneck before realizing that there was nothing wrong with it, it was just way too small for him. He was very proud of his cross-dressing for the night, we even discussed it as Stacy pinned on a "Joy" pin to the neck of his shirt. The convo went a little like this:

Stacy: "Nathan is that a woman's sweater?"
Nathan: "Yes and the turtleneck is too."
Stacy: "Yea I can really tell."
Nathan: "Thank you! And these are my most metro pants."
Me: "What does that mean they are too tight?"
Hoppes: "So those pants show a bulge?"
(And without missing a beat, or looking away from her work with the pin to actually CHECK whether or not they did, Stacy chimed in): "YES they do!"

I forced the boys to go through a Christmas card photo shoot before anything got too crazy. If you're lucky enough to get a card from us it may look similar to this:

As is the norm at every major event we attend, Tim enjoys a good upside-down bong.

At this point you are more than likely wanting me to get to the good part of "Cop Lights Flashing and Marriages Brewing." Though like the courteous neighbors they are, the boys had pre-warned our friendly building neighbors that we would, in fact, be having a rather large Christmas party on Friday night. Evidently that didn't do the trick because we got that dreaded knock on the door with the red and blues going outside. The bored cops of the greater Indianapolis area were scheming up a noise violation to lay on the innocent people in the world just trying to bring in the Christmas Holiday in real style. Thankfully the sweet (maybe mildly slurred) speech of Nathan got them to go away, but it was time to turn down the music. Whoever doesn't like "Jingle Bells" playing at top volume is the REAL grinch! (I guess it could have possibly been the 342 times that they put the playlist back to "Shots Shots Shots Shots"...but I'm not sure)

As the night rolled on...(insert random action shots):

(end random action shots)
...there was definitely love in the air. The Hot Toddies could have gone to their heads but when a boy and girl put on a really great sweater and awkward pair of socks you never know what might cause their hearts to skip a beat. Now, I'm not going to give away who it was:

...but most people could figure out who it was.

Along with the topic of love, I would like to send out my deepest apologies to Miss Kara Murphy. The pooooor girl had to put up with every boy trying to make out with her as the suggestively brushed by her. (Or as Nathan put it "Kara trying to make out with me") She was pinned as the target for the night and there was no escaping my roommates and the crazy guys they call friends. She was an excellent sport, even when Tim walked by and straight-up licked her face!! (Face-licking obviously being a sign of true affection)

The night continued on into a blur that probably shouldn't be discussed in a blog, but the important part is that an AFTER party actually happened the next morning. It included a large group of people participating in a good hour of thorough cleaning and a beer bong offering to the painters who were working in our entryway. My roommates have never been stingy with the beer bong.

Currently as I write this Tim is studying at the dining room table in his room and Nathan is probably sitting on the loveseat at the foot of his bed. Last night when we made dinner together the three of us had to decide whether we wanted to sit in Tim's room or on the floor in the living room together. We chose the floor.

The planning for the 3rd Annual Ugly Christmas Sweater party will begin in approximately May, so start collecting sweaters and crazy-cool Holiday socks now!

Monday, December 7, 2009

Baby It's Cold Outside!

Snow. The wonderful thing that means it's time to wear sweaters, scarves, fuzzy hats, and cute boots (or in my case gigantic snowboots suitable for a blizzard). Overnight last night we had our first snowfall of the year. After a friend from home called me pretty early to warn me about the roads, I knew I'd have to get ready quickly and allow some extra time to get to work.

I recently found out something that I really should have known, or realized, for my entire life. A doctor's strategy is to double book their days in order to fill in cancellations, etc. Luckily for everyone who will someday be my dental patient, I overbook my LIFE. This means I have a lot of practice...which in turn means I will be an excellent doctor. :) Anyway, this pertains to our snow day because I have been struggling lately with my car being frosted over in the mornings and I've really been cutting it down to the last minute on getting to work. So I hurried this morning, put on my dress clothes for work, got out my overly rugged boots (a fabulous combination with my outfit), and actually went out to my car early to start it and clean it off. When I walked out my door I was facing about 5 cars covered in snow. But when I looked at mine the entire front windshield was clean. Tim, who has to be at work an hour before me and has a much further drive, had already done this for me. I instantly smiled and thought to myself, "This is going to be a great week." I've been a fairly spoiled person my whole life. Not spoiled to the point that I don't appreciate things, or understand the value of a dollar, or know how to do things myself, but spoiled in the manner that I have a father who has two daughters that he would do ANYTHING for to make their lives easier. When I was in high school my dad always cleaned off our cars and ran them for awhile in the very early morning hours so that they would merely need warmed up to head to school. In college, I walked everywhere. Cleaning off my car to get to class was never a concern. Considering I think of my dad as a great man (actually the best I've ever met), when I saw Tim's act of kindness I couldn't help but think, "Now THAT is a good man."

Sunday, December 6, 2009


A week after telling my mother that if someone asked me on a date I'd immediately tell him no because the VERY little spare time that I have I just want to spend doing my own thing...a nice young man asked me out. I turned down dinner... but told him I'd go to a movie.

Sunday evening rolled around and I literally had 15 minutes from the time I got home before he was going to pick me up. I had already warned my roommates that I was, in fact, going on a date and that they needed to prepare themselves to be nice (HA!) I flew in the door to run back to my room to get ready. At this point I realized that Nick Hart was visiting for the night (please see post "Hart") and I knew this would be no ordinary encounter with this new guy. As I was back in my room multi-tasking (trying to restraighten my hair at the same time as change my clothes and shoes at the same time as eating dinner at the same time as answer the thousand phone calls I get on Sundays) I heard the boys scheming. Nathan came back and casually says, "Well, it's time to clean my guns." He got out all of his hunting guns, and most likely some others. While Nathan dug out his guns, Tim dug out his wigs. The three boys sat in the living room in mullet wigs (see pictures in previous post) and guns in hand. I was just finishing brushing my teeth (my favorite thing in the world to do) and I heard them answer the door. The next thing I heard was a loud chant of the guy's name until he agreed to bong a beer. My roommates have perfected what I just generally call, "The Chant". They have figured out that along with their strong peer pressure, chanting someone's name will ALWAYS make the person do whatever it is they want. That POOR boy!! I tried to hurry out to the living room to save him, but he was thankfully a very good sport.

As we walked away from the apartment I half-way apologized. I would never apologize for knowing, living with, and loving the two of them...but sometimes I have to apologize for not giving fair enough warnings.

If you want to date me I come with baggage. And that baggage is wrapped up into two excellent, but crazy, roommates.

Would You Like a Little Football With Your Tailgate?

In our pre-determined set of "house rules" that the boys and I made when we decided to live together it is stated that we must attend the Monon Bell and Oaken Bucket games on alternating years when they are at our respective schools. This was the year of the Oaken Bucket in Bloomington, IN.

Typical to our tailgating habits, we hit the fields very early. The boys didn't travel down to Bloomington the night before so they hit the road from Indianapolis around 5:15am. As we watched them approach the tailgate this is what we saw:

If you look closely you will see that they are wearing mullet wigs and carrying in their portion of the tailgate.

Our tailgate, which turned out to most likely be the largest non-frat tailgate in Bloomington that day, was a huge success. We included two of my all-time favorite things in the day: The Cupid Shuffle and making new friends.

After 8 hours of tailgating and 3 hours of football, most of us left to nap before a night out on the town. My roommates...however...chose to go to Panda Express and nearly get into a fight. But that's another story for another time.

Cheers to Football Season. Bring on the basketball!!